Day 247

Wednesday | October 31st, 2012


Lots of things to do today. It’s not just Halloween. I finally had the time to deal with the shit-mess ADT left in our bedroom. I spent my morning cutting through the wallpaper covering the top row of windows in the bedroom. I had intended to reveal the windows and cover them with rice paper, but just getting this done involved several detours.

The Styrofoam and wallpaper not only covered the windows, but also the gaps between the window panes and the frame which supported them. I had to spend more time making this look pretty and filling these gaps with insulating foam than I did actually taking the Styrofoam out.

I didn’t finish up until around 17.00 … on Halloween. This being Gyeongju, I didn’t really know where to go or have a plan to go a place or other costumed idiots to play with. Most depressing were the absences of TD, MH, and POD all of whom I’ve spent the last five or six Halloweens in Seoul with traipsing around and drinking all night. There was a sort of plan where some people might go to watch Halloween episodes of the Simpsons, but that wasn’t until 21.00ish.

In the time to kill, Meow made awesome budae jjigae (부대찌개, army stew) which I ate a lot of to support the alcohol I would seek out later. The rest of my evening was spent preparing to leave the house as a cow and sitting around in my office as half-cow with two very perplexed dogs staring at me (it was their first Halloween).

Later I met up with JH, PP, NO, BL, and an assortment of other unexpected coworkers (but most of them not in costume) at a bar called Coco’s. The owner recognized me for some reason and loved the cow. He kept coming up to me all night and saying how much he loved it. Of course, the cow was also assaulted (man, every time) by girls rubbing and touching the cow inappropriately. Other mainstays of the cow experience: drunk guys haranguing me about the absence of udders (I swear, the cow brings out serious animal issues with adults), everyone wanting their picture taken with “cow”, and people dragging the cow to tables for drinks. Perhaps the most annoying thing, is when drunk people attempt to strip off the cow mask to learn the secrets of the cow. But the jokes always on them because the cow costume is really two cow costumes put together, peel off one cow head, get to see the other cow head.

LG came along a little later as I’d asked him to to take pictures of cow. Every year I wear the cow costume, Meow takes a shaky or poorly lit picture and then by the time I remember to take a picture, too much alcohol has stirred me to do so, usually while peeing or when staring at myself in the bathroom mirror (like the hero image at the top). I really want better pictures of cow and cow’s outing and was a great way to involve a reluctant, costume abhorring LG in my favorite holiday.

As cow, I drank my cocktails with a straw through my nose (to the great giggles of others). This being a new town, a cow-virgin town, the other cow-is-an-alcoholic trick of sticking a beer bottle in my nose to pound it, also went over well.

I got to talk with a few folks I don’t normally cross paths with and it was great to be out. And the people I don’t see often all had that comment to make, “It’s great to see you out.” People must think I’m some sort of shut in, or worse, a married guy whose wife won’t let him come out very often and who has to “broker” an evening to see his buddies. That sucks, and it sucks hard, and that’s not my life. If it was, I’d kill myself or divorce and Meow knows it. Meow doesn’t want to be that kind of woman or wife either. We both enjoy our freedom and our independence. I love going out to dance and drink all night, I just haven’t really done that this year.

I had walked from my house all the way to the bar as cow, and, around 02.00, that’s the way I went home as well. At our gate, I fiddled with my key and came in without the dogs flipping out, but two steps in the courtyard, Twitchy saw cow and barked her deep, psycho dog bark and Naughty followed. I looked at them and assured them it was okay, “It’s just me.” I said. No joy. Twitchy was seriously freaked out even when I pulled the mask off, she was still in scared defend the house mode. I had to kneel down and let them both come closer to smell me before they would relax. They both licked my face all over, ashamed and joyful that it was really me. I had forgotten they don’t know about Halloween.

Inside, I ate two more bowls of Meow’s wonderful soup, drank water and watched the first three episodes of The Walking Dead. It was a pretty good Halloween.

The Daily Bullet

Behold, the Extra Credit Assignment. On its due date, it’s worth its full potential value, but when turned in late, it’s worth nothing. Tuesday I teach; Wednesday, I don’t. This student works hard, so we struck a bargin: put it on my desk and my officemate, LG will take a picture of it to prove it’s there.

(That’s my REAL NAME, btw, Maestro Grandeur le Pommée de ESL, and I never let anyone forget it.)

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